Every now and then, this job reminds me just how lucky I am. When a mother of the bride asked for a couple of references, I handed her ten—and within minutes, more than ninety former couples were blowing up my phone to volunteer. In this post, I talk about what happens when clients become genuine friends, why those relationships fuel my passion for DJing, and why even when a couple books someone “cheaper,” I’m still cheering for their happily ever after.
September 30, 2024
Today I was asked by the mother of a bride-to-be if I could give her a couple of references. I gave her ten.
I put out feelers on social media, asking if any of the couples for whom I have DJed would allow me to give their names and numbers as references. I was immediately dinged by ten former clients with a resounding yes. So I shared all ten. And then, sixteen more responded. Then another twenty-two. Brides and grooms continue to respond even as I write this entry. In total, sixty-three couples have answered so far. At moments like these, I feel such a rush of emotion. It is like a giant Neapolitan scoop of flattery, humility, and joy.
The couples I DJ for are not "another paycheck." I often wonder how many wedding vendors think of their clients in this way. I would like to believe that most do not because I can't fathom how any vendor can remain detached, distant, and impersonal with a newlywed couple who has invited him or her to take part in the biggest day of their lives. I treat every couple like old friends, and in the course of planning and collaborating, something magical always happens by the time we reach the wedding day—we have become friends.
Some DJs tell me it is unprofessional to have relationships with clients. I disagree. The friendships I forge with clients reignites my passion for DJing. I perform better for them because I care about them. I invest in meaningful conversation, and I work closely with my couples to give them the wedding days of their dreams. Along the way, I find inspiration from them, and that leads to admiration. By the time they say "I Do," I am celebrating with them. And the feeling, from all that I can tell, is mutual. How else can I explain why so many couples become repeat customers? How else can I explain why couples continue to respond yes to my request for references as I continue to write this entry?
My relationships with the couples I DJ for mean everything to me, and I like to think it shows in everything I do. This was what led me to become a wedding officiant! And would you believe that I regularly check in with my couples long after my work is done? I keep in touch with the couples I DJed for, some dating as far back as as 20 years or more.
I am so thankful for all of the extraordinary couples that have entered my life. I am blessed to have worked with every one of them. I believe I am actually indebted to them for allowing me the opportunity to be their DJ. And as I have said before, I am unapologetically a true romantic. My investment in their marriage extends well beyond last call at the bar. My investment means that I continue rooting for them, and it is important to me that they all have long lifetimes of love, laughter, and happiness.
This is why, when I ask for references, so many couples are there to support me. In the time it has taken me to write this entry, another thirty-one couples have responded yes, bringing my total to ninety-four couples in under fifteen minutes. I am a very lucky individual, indeed.
Oh, and what became of the mother of the bride-to-be? Well, she and her daughter decided to go with someone else. They found a "cheaper" DJ, and that is perfectly fine. I completely understand the challenges of staying within your budget. I am genuinely happy they found someone at a lower price. I want what's best for all brides, and sometimes, what's best isn't me. They did, however, tell my that my references were fantastic. Of course they were. We are friends, after all.
I hope come wedding day, the DJ gives this couple the wedding of their dreams. I want every wedding to be magical, even if I am not the lucky one to give them that happily ever after. I did give them some friendly advice, though. I told them for their safety and protection, they need to make sure that whoever they choose to DJ provides a legal contract, is insured, has positive reviews, shares videos of his or her performance, and has at least two or three years' experience. "Cheaper" DJs are always a gamble. As with all things in life, you get what you pay for. My basic wedding package is already lower than my competitors at $950. I will always try to have one budget-friendly package under $1K because all brides deserve their fairy tale wedding no matter their budgets. So when I am told by couples they have found someone "cheaper," I can't help but worry about them. A reputable and seasoned DJ rarely costs less than me.
I thanked them for talking with me and for considering me as an option for their wedding day. There are no hard feelings. There are never hard feelings, and I never burn bridges. Patience is key. My next couple will book shortly, and when they do, they will be my next new friends.